my mummy sweetest...

My mummy is the bestest mom in the world.
My mummy gets angry if i dont cut my nails.
My mummy nevers gets angry otherwise.
My mummy is always there for me when i feel depressed and never asks me the question "y".
My mummy dances before attending an interview.
My mummy is so cuttteee...
My mummy loves my "otherside".
My mummy took her own time to complete the course ( hats off to u mummy for being strong)
my mummy dances all the nite with lots of energy.
my mummy behaves like a child.
my mummy is going to say "yahe he right choice baby..aaha"...
Me and my mummy share a tragic past which brought us close...

P.s.:
~otherside: continue to love my mummy ..my mummy likes u a lot....
~ God: I dont believe in u.. if my mummy will get her guy, I ll come and pray in the church...... Give them power to succeed against all odds.
~Mummy ( who doesnt know the blog exist): I didnt shed tears today.. I reserve it for ur marriage with ur guy....

weakness

Im addicted to smoking(refer to previous posts).
Does it mean that I will be addicted to cigarette forever in my life and suffer from cancer?
No way... I have never bowed before cigarette in my life. Be it wills-navy cut or Indian kings or marlbaro. My only worry is who will buy the cigaratte if I dont buy it... Once someone starts smoking, I ll quit smoking...
Also I promised the kirana shop owner that I wont quit smoking until he finds a new buyer.
As of now, the time i spend in smoking is the best time in the whole day, or week..
Also should I say the obvious thing ? that I Love cigarette. some one buy a cigarette and relieve me from my guilt ... quick :))...
This baby is not walking. This baby is just standing and evaluating all the options.. Evaluating the options like A* algorithm of AI;

P.s. What happened to my blog ?

Nothing. Just a conflict between ethics,values and selfishness in my mind is screwing my happiness..............and screwing this already screwed blog

Merci

Smoked my twentieth cigarette today (refer to previous post incase u r wondering about me smoking.)

Ppl, dont think im dumbo. Im not. Im not. Im not.

Sample incidents.

Girl1: "whats ur CQ"

Me: "Dont ask me...". (I really hate telling my CQ. No, mine is an average CQ. But even if it is high, I would not like to tell my CQ. I belong to "knowledge only matters" category)

Girl1: "its ok.. Mine is also low"...
I tell her my CQ. She says..
"My god.. i didnt think that u r that high"...

Next incident.

Girl2: "whats ur CQ"... (she didnt get the college which was allotted to me in the Exchange programme)

I tell her my CQ.. she says..
"My god... I didnt think that u r that high"....

Ppl.. Just because I wear an ordinary shirt, an ordinary pant, speak below average english doesnt mean that im a dumbo...
Me wondering who s the next victim...

Mother of all decisions

this post will be about thoughts which are going in my mind at present..

First, if u dont like someone's post, the best way to comment is " I like the title, I like the colour, I like blah, I like blah blah"... :P.
No, I dont follow that style..

Second, Im moving to a state where I have to take mother of all decisions. Can I pull it off ? Im wondering.. its like a baby taking its first step. Guess it will be so painful but its the first step towards freedom..
Just like smoking 100 cigarettes in a single day and quitting smoking from that moment.

I have taken tough decisions in the past. I left a sure shot exchange offer in IIT. I guess there were 2 offers. One was taken by the professor. Other one was rejected by a guy for some silly reason. I had a good CG which was an important criteria. But then, I had to stand by my values. I didnt apply.
The offer would have been extremely good. With a nice stipend in germany, I would have spent time with sands at Munich. But then, that was a tough decision to make. I still made it. Will I ever till my children about the offer and my decision? Yes, I will.. Let them Judge whether I was a fool or a person who stood for his values.

Should I be selfish now ? Should I quit... Should I not quit and suffer like a silent sea with restless waves..... The waves; Yes, the restless waves; the tough decision ahead; I can postpone it; but I know that i cant avoid it.... There are only two roads ahead... One strewn with flowers leads to the cliff.. The other full of thorns leads to the light at the end of tunnel...
Let me start smoking the first cigarette now... I wish the 100th one should not come in my life.... But reality is not maniratnam movie where everyone is happy at the end....

yeah, when the 100 th one comes, I know that I ll be the ONE to take the mother of all decisions....

p.s: 1) Song of the moment.. "it all comes down to this- Oru nallil from puthupettai".

2) Time to quit this blog is nearing. Once I smoke the 100th one, I guess I ll leave this... and end one phase of my life. A beautiful LIFE.

just a beep

no.. me not going to blog regularly .. atleast as of now. Have to come back from the depression or hibernation.
But then i felt like blogging this stuff.

Me: " dude. No one called me for a treat after CRP"
he: " machi, no one will call u.. u have to pester them"
me : " it doesnt happen that way"
He : " It happens that way in this place. People are shameless. It doesnt matter whether u worked, whether u spoke positive words."
Me : " but im not going to ask anyone. If they give, they give; Im not shameless"

shortly I got invited to a treat by my favorite gal in the campus :).
I hope she gets whatever she wants out of life. Atb for a kickass life, Anju :D
( Though she will never read this, it gives pleasure to have this in the blog because at the age of 60, u can read these things to ur grandchildren..he he)

Few things I realise after placement process and seniors bidding adieu.

--> Most of the friendships will not survive the first one year.

--> At the end of two years in college, people were settling 25 rupees.

--> People are really selfish. I thought i was one of the most selfish guys in this world, but then Im not.

--> A strange quality which I found recently in myself. If I give importance to someone, that someone has to give importance to me (especially if he gives importance to other tom, dick and harry who wont be putting a fight for him incaseof emergency).

--> got to know some nice seniors who liked me a lot. Im happy that I worked for them and they got their jobs. No , its not about recognition. Its about repaying them.

--> got to see how people fought for their loved ones. Cant forget two pairs. Hope they find peace and love in one another. Both the pairs have a mallu guy/gal:)

--> I know that im not as fluent or eloquent unlike others but then, i can take responsibilities, inspire people and fight for what i want in life.

May be I m a good manager in making......
May be Im boasting.
But then this is my blog.
and u r my friends.


P.s:
~otherside : forget abt the wounds. Sometimes even scars look good; teaches u few things; And turn on men :). I meant the finger injury :)

~proff: I know that someone is hittin u or u r trying to hit someone. hmm Life rolls the dice.

~scotland: Lost in thoughts ?.. what the fuck.. dont cheat me. U still cant get away from someone..

~coconut bunch: atleast u have some peace in life... good. Me happy for u

~unknown seniors whom i like or who likes me: Atb in life and adieu

~unknown juniors: welcome aboard... Lets party hard.

Me off to sleep with this entry.. for a long sleep.....