celebrating death

I promised that this will be my last post. But then , this is not my last:).
I have decided to celebrate death in my own special way. So wait for two or three more.
The next five days will teach me many things in life which I have never studied before.

I am not an egoist when it comes to relationships. Because I know the value of friends. And by friends, I mean people who will be there for you 24*7*365; People who will give u a call as soon as they know that nothing is working in your direction; People who will feel happy when you feel happy. I dont refer to any acquaintance as friends. The term Networking can go to hell.

I dont want anyone to feel sad for me. I hate people showing sympathy unless I ask you to call me up and share my inner thoughts. No one needs to dig my grave. I will rise again .. yeah in my own hard way.. in perfect peace.

The real reason why I want to stop blogging is all there in the name of this blog. I, who found joy even when nothing substantial happened in life, have ceased to find joy and pleasure in life.

I saw the mirror. I saw pale eyes which once had fire in them.
I saw the mirror. I saw a loser who never lost in his life.
I saw the mirror. I never saw myself.
I saw the mirror. I saw the death.
I saw the mirror. I saw my darkside.
I saw the mirror. I saw you.

I saw the mirror. I saw my ethics and selfishness fighting with each other.
I saw the mirror. I saw my selfishness winning hands down.
I saw the mirror. I saw Hope. Hope that I will live.

I saw the mirror. I broke the mirror. Period.

As I continue to die, I do not want anyone to wail for me. I do not want anyone to perform my last rites. I do not want to listen to the obvious. But then, this is what I want as well. So be away from me and be close to my heart.

Gentlemen, I smoked my 95th cigarette.

and I promise you people, as I smoke my 100th, the eagle (check out the link) will soar high. Back to Sky where it always belonged to...free,careless,joyous.